Mothers at Home, Professionals at Work
Working Mothers have changed the dynamics of family, today. The tradition of women who naturally become housewives after marriage is now, a story of the past. With more and more educated and career-driven women emerging, the modern society is witness to supermoms who are equally capable professionals in their areas of expertise.
But this new look of the modern day mother, hasn’t changed one bit, the special qualities that naturally seem to run in mothers since time immemorial. Mothers, we know have overwhelmed us with their patience, devotion, affection, endurance and extraordinary love. In addition to that, in today’s context, they are one of the bread-earners (or sometimes, the sole bread-earner) in the family. But make no mistake, it only means that the modern day, working mothers have more roles to play.
On Mother’s Day, we picked some of the working supermoms, whose greatest joys do not necessarily come from what they have achieved in their careers, as one may also assume, but whose happiest moments are derived from being with their children and family.
DAISY MEZHüR, Mission Director-SRCW
|Daisy with her Mom|
With a tinge of laughter, mother of two boys, Daisy Mezhür, who is serving as Mission Director at SRCW, begins by saying, “when you become a mother, you surprise yourself! My challenge was to balance how to look after the kids and home, and how I should go to work on time, since I also take my job seriously. It took some time to adjust work and fitting into a mother’s role, but with a good support system…at the end of the day, you can balance both.”
Giving equal importance to both work and home, she says, “it is no magic but your happiness of the job reflects in the family and your happiness at home again reflects in your work/career.” “For me, I am not a very conventional lady, I don’t take life too seriously, but one day at a time, and beyond your best, you don’t have to push yourself...” and this is what she would also like her children to carry forward, while adding, “Whatever you do, put God first and everything will fall into place.”
“Everybody will say that my mother is the best, but give me all the women in the world, and my mother is the best mother”, she says with confidence even as she remembers her for her big heart, her wisdom, her patience, and her forgiving spirit, which Daisy also tries to emulate.
MEZIVOLü THERIEH, Chief Judicial Magistrate, Kohima
Chief Judicial Magistrate of Kohima, Mezivolü Therieh had expected that handling kids would be a lot more easier than she actually thought while admitting that, ‘it’s a tough job, but manageable and enjoyable so far.’ Motherhood, she says, is no joke and to this, she adds, “handling three isn’t easy and I always wonder how my mother managed all the 7 of us.”
Understandably, it is a hard task, balancing her work pressure with the demands of the family, home and other obligations, but according to her, “time management and good support system at home are some of the biggest factors to be a successful mother, working professional and home maker”, all at one go. She follows the 3 Hs in life, which, she explains are Honesty, Hard Work and Humility and these, she hopes her kids sees in her and well, follow them.
The mother of 3 children, derives happiness from spending quality time with the family, away from all hustles and bustles of daily activities.
DR. ESTHER RAIKHAN, Veterinary Assistant Surgeon
|Dr. Esther Raikhan|
For Esther Raikhan, who thought she was pretty good with kids even before getting married, with experiences of taking care of babies and kids of her elder brother and some relatives, the reality of motherhood still came as a surprise to her. She believes that God gives extra grace each and every day to handle pressure as it comes, while referring to the amount of energy it takes to being a mother of little ones.
As a working mother, she says, one of the greatest challenges, “is to give undivided attention to my family as well as work, as I want to give my best for both and make sure neither side is neglected or suffered.” And to do this, she takes one day at a time, while adding, “of course without prayer, God's grace and support of my husband, I would never be able to manage.”
The mother of two would describe- holding her babies for the first time, seeing them smile with innocence, hearing them speak their first words, or taking their first little steps to walk, and seeing their little personalities developing with their own thoughts, talents and opinions, as some of her happiest moments. She hopes that her children grow in love, faith, prayer and above all, in the fear of God, the ingredients, which she believes will help them find the purpose of living and become a blessing, while she, herself, has also been inspired by the virtues of her own mother which are selflessness, hard work, endurance, a giving heart, and a lot of sacrifices.
AVINUO JAMIR, District Commandant, Home Guards
Avinuo Jamir, who is expecting her second child, has emerged stronger, more patient and enduring from motherhood, even while recalling the special things her mother taught her such as inner peace, patience, endurance and connection with God.
Currently serving as a District Commandant, she however regrets having to go away for long durations or having to be alone most of the time, considering that her husband is also in the same profession. Needless to say, the nature of their jobs comes as a great challenge. But even when faced with such circumstances, it’s her positive spirit that keeps her going.
She finds joy in being with her daughter, which is evident from what she says- “every day that I get to spend with my daughter is very precious.” She also hopes for her children to grow up with confidence, maturity and positive attitude, while she strives to create that atmosphere for them.
KAKHELI JIMOMI, Associate Pastor, Women
From her expectations of motherhood being all lively, joyous and happy-go-lucky kind of thing, Kakheli Jimomi realizes that motherhood does bring in these feelings but is, in reality, very different. At a time when the world is going so fast and times are very challenging and confusing, she says, “I also realized we have to be very wise…and the more the children grow up, I should have a closer and stronger relationship with God.”
She strengthens herself as a working mother by taking things positively-“there are times I pat myself, since there are very few to compliment us. Sometimes after so much of work, we need some appreciation, but we can’t expect that anymore. I am not saying that I am so proud of myself, but it helps you keep going and that’s how I strengthen myself.” The bonus, for her, being, her husband and children are always appreciate of her even after a hard day’s work.
For her, to hear the sound of her children tell her, “you are the best mom in the world!” or watching them relish the food she cooked, make her the happiest! And if there is one thing she wants her children to remember her by, it would be for them to think of her as a God fearing lady and a cheerful giver. It is no wonder that some of the best things she learned from her own mother were of giving cheerfully, of hard work and courage, and putting faith and trust in God.
Looking at the early stages of her motherhood, Watimongla, now, mother of two children and a Trainer of Teachers, finds it amazing that she could manage nurturing a newborn and at the same time, fulfill her duties at work. She remembers how sometimes her duty stretches to giving a 10-day training and how the whole family would move with her, so she could supervise and monitor what she was assigned to do.
Even as the sole bread-earner in the family, she tremendously enjoys her job and her husband sure does not mind taking care of the children whenever the need arises. And yet, as a working mother, she has had her rough times. There are also days when she had to arrange everything for an entire week in advance, so everything is n place, when she goes missing for a week’s training. But, she is grateful to have a supportive husband through it all. It is hardly surprising that she is happy whenever she is with her children, husband and family.
She may have lost her mother, but she insists that, “what I am today is all because of her. How I am taking care of my children, I learnt from her.”
ANNIE KATH, Teacher & President of NCWA
Teacher and Social Worker, Annie Kath firmly believes that, “you learn what love is, by looking after children.” Regardless of her hectic teaching job and other social responsibilities, she has always considered children and home as her first priority. “Our children are our God-given responsibilities, and they are my first priority”, she says.
And therefore, her happy moments are also when her children are doing well, and doing the will of God. To love others and to be God-fearing are few of the things she wishes her children learn as they go along in life. These, of course are also hallmarks of her own mother, who also taught them to be prayerful wherever they are, and to never speak ill of others.
One more thing, she insists upon is time. “I always tell my children- we can borrow money and things but we will never be able to buy time. Time is very precious.”
N. BONGMAI KONYAK, Inspector of Statistics
N. Bonhmai Konyak didn’t have the faintest idea that motherhood would be made of sleepless nights and being tired all the time, and she was obviously taken by surprise when she became a mother, “since you always think in terms of, ‘the baby is so cute’”.
But nothing could compare to the joy the first time they smile at you or the first time, they say, Mama, says the mother of two children. “It is like the moment to die for”, she delightfully expresses despite mothers having to monitor their children 24/7, which is actually more than a full time job. Her greatest challenge as a working mother comes from looking for a good babysitter in a day and age, where you cannot trust anybody to look after your baby, regardless of the fact that she had sometimes brought home her office work to fulfill her duty both as a mother and a professional.
She lost her own mother at the age of 13 but drew great lessons from her stepmother and her maternal grandmother, who instilled in her the fear of God. To which end, she also adds, “along the years, even at my worst, I have learn to look to God.” While she has never forgotten what her stepmom taught her- “a girl’s life is like an egg, once you break it, you cannot bring it back together. You have to live carefully.”
Well, she hopes that someday, her children grow up in the fear of God, be good human beings, stand on their own feet, be independent and behave responsibly.